I know I have not been adding to
the blog lately. However, I have been going through some changes
lately. The changes can be hard to describe.
I had to learn how to handle my
mothers new routines as she is getting older. Also I had a similar
process with my dad. Yet when I figured it out, I was not myself.
Someway I had to communicate that I wanted to know what was planned
for my future. When I asked; I got the response “do not worry about
it, because it is far down the road.” or “only you can pick
yourself up and handle it.”
Yet
these answers kept me lost at what I am to do. I now am meeting with
a therapist who helps me be aware of where I am at, and what to do
about it.
When
I explained to my parents what was happening, they thought I was
making excuses or not wanting to try. That makes me scared to speak
to them about my problems. I am trapped because they answer questions
from how they we're raised. So now I am asking my brothers more,
because they are more where I am at. Basically, all I am asking for
is honest answers about planning for my future.
